Lovin 'Em and Leavin 'Em...

Greetings!! It has been a while since I have written, and I have missed you all!! May is always a crazy time in our family…wrapping up things at school, preparing the children to go to summer camp, and all of that on top of life as we know it.  But, I’m back, and I’ve been thinking of a few things I’d like to say, so I hope to have some more frequent blog entries in the upcoming few weeks.

For now, I really wanted to focus on one of my most favorite (and, to me, one of the most important) things that I have learned so far in this journey, and that is how to “love ‘em and leave ‘em” – and no, I am not talking about people! --  I am talking about those foods or dishes, or your Aunt Hattie’s homemade chocolate soufflé…those things that truly are a once-in-a-blue-moon special treats.  Whether it’s that you only see Aunt Hattie once a year and you truly look forward to eating that soufflé, or whether it is that you are in a place on a vacation or trip and you want to truly experience the culture there (or, as in my case, you really, really want to go to the restaurant that someone recommended and when you get there, the menu is so delicious you just want to run in the other direction instead of having to actually look at it and make good choices.)  Please note: I stayed, I made awesome choices and I enjoyed the *heck* out of that meal!! 

As you all know, I have changed my lifestyle and eating habits dramatically in the past four months.  This means that I traded my cupcakes for kale; my candy bars for 85% dark chocolate, my coffee for green tea, and so on and so forth!  And here’s the bottom line, folks:  this is not something you can do half-way. You’re either in or you’re out.  You can’t do it some times. You have to do it all the time.  Yes, that’s right: EVERY SINGLE DAY, and, quite frankly, every single meal.  And that’s just it, bottom line, in a nut shell – otherwise, there is no way to truly achieve optimal health

Now, please note -- this does NOT mean that you will never ever have that cupcake (cookie, chocolate truffle, etc , etc) again.  There is no way that I could have made the major changes that I have made in my diet, nor make the choices that I make on a daily basis in regard to food (and for those of you who know me, you know that the eating part of this is not what has been the hard part for me – the exercise IS an ongoing issue for me…but one I am working on on a daily basis!) and think that I would never have another cupcake (my vice of choice…we all have one).

Here’s the deal:  iIf I really, really, want a cupcake, then I actually do have a bite (I usually take the whole thing & cut it into quarters – then I have a quarter and decide if I want another; usually (much to my surprise – lately, every time), the answer is no.  Then I go on my merry way, eat my kale with my dinner,  drink my water and get back on track – by doing all of this,  the treat becomes a momentary enjoyment, something that has a “been there, done that” kind of feel. By doing this, I am enjoying myself, (side note:  a recent trip to Charleston brought a few opportunities to indulge – while I did have a wonderful bite of a home-made lemon crème pie,  the truth is, after I had it, I forgot about it…) but in still staying with my “program” (diet, whatever you want to call it…I call it my life!), it becomes something that makes me even stronger the next time I happen to be in a situation where temptations are present.   

This love ‘em and leave ‘em approach to dessert (for me, this is my touchy point…for you, it may be  french fries or something of that ilk) is something that is brand new for me.

Five months ago, here’s how the scene in the restaurant would have gone:  I probably would NOT have had that bite of the lemon crème pie, but instead would have said, “No thank you,” gone back to the hotel and eaten numerous cookies or what have you in an attempt to quell the memory or desire for dessert.   And then I would have carried that idea of that dang lemon crème pie (and I’m not much of a fruit-dessert lover, so it’s not even anything I would really have wanted in the first place, but by turning it down, I would make it an object of desire) with me for the next two or three weeks, eating everything else in the meantime. 

Instead, I have now learned to decide if I really want something, then I have a bite, savor the treat, and then, blessedly! , I am able to LEAVE IT THERE.  I no longer carry the desserts or foods that I don’t eat home with me!  I cannot begin to tell you the amount of freedom I feel by not doing this any longer.  It truly is one of the best things I have learned so far in this journey! And, believe me: I have learned soooo much!

But, I will tell you:  of all the lessons I’ve learned (and I hope to pass even a few of them on),  it is truly awesome to know that there is no dessert going home with me in any shape or form whatsoever anymore: not in a “doggie bag,” not in my purse, and most definitely, not in my mind!!

And that, my friends, well, that is a true move forward.  

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.”

 ~Lao Tzu,  Founder of Taoism